kiss of all kisses

i have known those to avoid the big lip lock on new year's eve...why? i must ask...i actually wanted to kiss someone specific-just for kissings' sake...i somewhat feel that it still might actually happen...maybe not at midnight- maybe not tonight, but i would love to hold in the hopes that even a kiss is worth the wait...

for some of my friends, the kiss is a sacred thing...not to be disclosed to just anyone...so- what's a girl to do? so, the adventure of tonight will be one for future documentation...i know your just dying to know...

well, the close of a most excellent year is happening today...i asked my friend A. what number he would give it- he picked 7 out of 10 in rating the year...i went higher than 7 because of the most excellent move to austin...things have gone much better than i ever expected and my incredible world of good people have made my life so much more interesting...

i will toast a number of people tonight...my friend mer and i are headed out to have a little fun with the city...a toast to the ryan's- a toast to the 'brew'- a toast to the longhorns for wed- and a toast to the good weather of texas...i love you all so much...happy new year...

so what do you do?

i love random events...we went to the park today just to goof off and have some fun...by the way, it is so good to be home...i left orlando at 6 yesterday morning and then pulled into austin at 12:15am last night..thank the Lord for being home...

anyway, i wish that everyone could just meet someone everyday and hear their story...the world gets smaller with each story you hear...jake was meant to be in our world today...i love that...

i would like to pose a question to you peeps- why do you think that Christ told the ones who were healed not to tell anyone about the healing? i started reading mark to get ready for manya's class and i think this is the one thing that bothered me the most...i would love some feedback because "economically"- relationally, what does this mean for us?

and i would like to leave with a wish that there might be someone to kiss tomorrow night...stranger, friend, foe- whatever, but some good lip at midnight would really make my year...if you know anyone, converse about it with me...

what a boring blog- but this is the result of a road trip from hades...tomorrow, i will conquer my indepth insights to God + world is not greater than or = to God alone...join me tomorrow for the wacky adventure...peace

infection of the soul

"When [she] believed that [she] had heard the call it seemed to [her] that [she] could see [her] future, [her] life, intact and on all sides complete and invioable, like a classic and serene vase, where the spirit could be born anew sheltered from the harsh gale of living an die so, peacefully, with only the far sound of the circumvented wind, with scarce even a handful of rotting dust to be diposed of. That was what the word seminary meant: quiet and safe walls within which the hampered and garmentworried spirit could learn anew serenity to contemplate without horror or alarm its own nakedness." William Faulkner- Light in August

faulkner is sometimes hard to read for me...but this book was great...like reading james joyce- it takes some time and energy...but his story of the presbyterian pastor in this book is compelling...hightower's reflections are grand...of how experience-almost indicitively-brings you along in life...yes i used "inclusiveness" in the first paragraph, but it was something that moved me...to contemplate without horror the nakedness of the soul...is it possible?

"if you love me we will make a beautiful kingdom out of this yuckiness"...that is how it will have to be for me and God- and me and whoever it is that i can pour out this cup that is overflowing on...i am okay with that...this might just be a summation of hope...

moments of clarity

does everyone have these? the moment when a defining word, or action, or art makes your mind come to the exact and precise thing in which you should do...i have come to understand that the very normal things everyday mean something in the grand scheme of life...but there are some normal moments that spell out a grander picture...like a conversation started with a stranger and it ends up bearing an answer to the question you've been pondering for months...i like these things- maybe we try too hard to define our lives when in all actuality, the answer is right there in front of you...normally- an a-ha moment with no dress up...

for those who i care so deeply for, sharing these moments mean the world to me...for my sister- go...go...fly...run...be...laugh...enjoy...a-ha...

the calling of our lives actually happens within each moment that passes...even when there seems to be nothing going on- the call is living within that moment...even when it is ugly...

so for all my loves...go-fly-run-absorb-touch-be-live...a-ha...

rearview mirror=ugly

so...i don't know how many others in this world realize this, but i have spent too much time in the car, and with that comes the inevitable looking in the rearview mirror for numerous reasons: traffic, hair adjustments, nose checks...and with this you realize exactly what you really look like outside of your house...i have determined that we should carry around the rv mirror to get the real picture of ourselves each morning...my picture is scarry...i now see that my perception is indeed not the reality of others...note to self- get sun lighting and close up mirror before going any further...

i saw a dolphin today on the east coast of satellite beach...it was incredible...my friend chris was giving me the tour and i must say, it was delightful...oysters and beer- sand between my toes...for me, it doesn't get any better than this! thanks chris for the good times today...i even got to ride in his jag today...i did not look in the rearview mirror...

i only have three days left in the grand state of florida...shopping tomorrow, and i am jonesing for the BUCK...it has been a while...icedgrandenonfatpumpkinspicelatte...mmmmmmmmm...

i think...

i am thinking that 27 hours was worth it...the beauty of florida is something that i have found beckoning me...i searched calls here last night on the pcusa website and i thought- yes, i can handle the sand and water...i could suffer in florida i think...

one week from today, the beloved language class of hebrew begins...i am personally stoked due to my sick love of wanting to learn a new language...the rumor is that there is only about 2000 hebrew words in the language...do-able? i think so...

my friends are all over the country with their families- except the lone postman in austin...to be with them again is a strong desire of my heart...it's amazing how fast you come to love those you are surrounded by...especially when they are all so cool...

yesterday i visited a boardwalk to a lake...cranes, lapping waves, boats...it makes me happy to be alive...may all have a great day in life today...less than a week to find someone to kiss on the eve of the new year...do-able? i think so...

tis the season

even though it is 75 degrees outside, watching "the christmas story" makes everything okay...there is something about the changing the tire scene that makes me laugh no matter how many times i have seen it...

i do want to note that my friend nancy tried to tell me about the panhandle of florida...she and brad are right about most things in my life...this was just another thing to add to the list of things they know a lot about...here's to the steens...

i am going to try to see memoirs of a geisha today...it is my favorite book...i hope the movie lives up to it somewhat...if you have not read the book, do by all means...it will be good for you...

well, today is the merry day of christmas...love and peace to all today...

misleading panhandles

texas has one big piece of a panhandle...other states have small ones- like oklahoma- and i would venture to count the boots of certain other southern states a cousin of the panhandle...but let me tell you...the panhandle of florida is one crazy bitch! i crossed the border thinking it could not be that long to orlando only to have a road sign with a big 180mi to tallahassee...by this time, i really wanted some weed...not that i'm an avid weed smoker, but at this precise moment, it was either weed, xanax, and since you cannot drink and drive, the "tonics" were useless to me...8 hours later i arrived in orlando...

i am a usually a big road trip person...this one just plain pissed me off...i mean really, how big do you think florida could be? the map of the panhandle was in some small square on the bottom of the page and i was completely disillusioned...reality slapped me with the road sign...

the first 45 record i ever bought was "centerfold" by j geils band...it was only then, when i heard this song did the world seem to align itself for me...the dashes in the road hypmotized me and time drifted on as i wove my way down I-10...

i hit gulfport, mississippi about 11 last night...i do not know why we have quit talking about the damage of the hurricane...it was so dark and i could see miles and miles of trash bags from the clean up of the interstate...debris was still scattered all over, road signs torn in half, billboards stripped of their advertisements and bent hanging in the air...somehow, we suppose (or rather i) that things are back to usual...where did i miss that millions of people are still without a home and the debris is still lingering and pointing to the fact that something has really gone wrong...God have mercy on my quick-to-forget heart...

giving a shout out from florida...peace to all

underdog cigarettes

i am an american spirit cigarette lover...i started with them, and i am ending with them...last night i ran out and my sister convinced me to consider the cig machine...we went to view the choices and somehow she convinced me to buy the underdog cigarette...as if we needed to support some soon-to-be bankrupt company...i am here to tell you, don't do it...they ended up being crap...well, they are all crap, but these were the crap of the crap...

a friend at the table with us began a conversation about things NEVER to go underdog on...for her, it was mayonaise, toilet paper, newspapers...and of course, the smokes...but this is also a woman that with intention buys old VCR's and electronic devices for her children to have fun taking apart...she has four, two of them twins and they are not allowed to smash them up- they must use a phillips or whatever the other one is called screwdrivers...and yes, they know the terminology...i get ideas from this family...hotdog relish is one of the things to go underdog on...

i also sat across the table from a man last night who was holding four rose bowl tickets...he was trying to decide whether or not to sell them...i thought that was the craziest idea i have ever heard (or at least for that day)...he even has a friend, also at the table, who owns a plane and is willing to take them there...this is not a situation to go underdog on...you must embrace this opportunity...

some people say UT is the underdog...if this is true, then i am going to have to go underdog on this situation...why not? i live in austin...if for no other reason the kicker for UT is from my hometown...go underdogs...

another thing not to go underdog on is coffee...i am extremely prejudiced in this area, being a barista for the BUCK... seriously, don't go there...

it also seems that the word CHRISTMAS is going underdog this year...amazing...and it is not just because i am a christian, it just cracks me up because truly, jesus was not meaning to offend anyone...and if anyone is a champion for underdogs, it is definitely jesus....look who was picked to follow him...underdogs...

merry christmas to all the underdogs...

capture the jeep

i will be leaving on friday to make a two day trip to florida...i am going to visit my mom who just moved there over 7 weeks ago...she drove my jeep there and i am going to capture it back...it feels like a game where she stole it and drove as far as she could go and i am just now on the hunt to find it...holding my breath that all goes well...its like a recon mission...like you need special skills to drive across the u.s...

so i have discovered my greatest love so far (this week)...i gave up beer for a while, i cannot really confess as to why, you could call it the control of a vodka tonic, but i have been controlled by the longing for TECATE...with a LIME...this is similiar to subliminal messaging...you will want one as well after you read this...there is something about mexican beers that make you think you can feel the sand in between your toes...this does not happen with all beers...

i also have been on the topic of designer dogs...if you breed a maltese and a chihuahua? i thought it might be a malhuahua...that is much more fun than to say chaltese....it may take on name variations of spelling such as children with the name christie...or cristi...or christee...or whatever...this is a whole new ballgame in the world of pets...i like plain old dogs like bradley and floyd...no breeds...just raw, usual dogs...it makes me happy to know we don't really have to have such high expectations for dogs...there is proof that non-breeding still offers quality pet life...

i will toast a TECATE to all those who are non-breeders...life is probably much more fun...

cafe of nostalgia

so the christmas music is playing...white christmas...and there actually might be a chance of that happening this year...i like repeating things that have meant so much to me...this summer i had a saying to my friends that i feel as if i run in several different worlds....church world, pub world, starbucks world, music world...my biggest dream is that all of these worlds would collide and that we could all be in the same place at the same time...it did happen once...i even sang a song that i wrote about a customer that i met at starbucks...big daddy is what we called him...all of my worlds knew about this guy, but never were they all in the same place to laugh about it at the same time...that experience was on the highlights list of this year...

in austin, i only have one world...school world...all i do and all the people i know and spend time with are right there...i look at the value of experiencing life with so many worlds going on at the same time and i think that this is one thing i would like to do this spring...create some different worlds in austin...i have never been so content with just one world...but even being away from that world makes me realize how much i depend on this precious world...

since i have been back in the falls, i have not been to one place where i did not see at least three people or more that i knew...they all knew i moved to austin, they wanted to know about finals...and it was interesting that even though i was absent from this world, i was still a part of it...i am so grateful for the hearts who remember...who care...

so merry christmas to all of my worlds...if it is true that all of your stories are a part of me, then somehow, you all know each other...

it is finished

well, at 7:58am i woke up and realized the first sermon begins at 8:15...this is the story of my life...i had three services to preach for and i was already late for the first one...indeed i had to trust in the quote from friday...where was jensen as the back up alarm clock when i needed him? such is life...i must say to God be all glory because i think it actually was the best time ever in the pulpit...i will take orders for the recording!!

i pray for us all to enjoy these next few weeks...eat, DRINK, and be merry...because i definitely believe "that's what Jesus would freakin do!" i already miss everyone...grace and peace...

if tomorrow never comes

somehow i agreed to take on the monumental task of preaching after a week of finals...this is how it always goes for me- i agree when i am not overloaded, then i grieve when it is upon me...but this time is different...the text is classic christmas and it is packed with metaphors that can only lead us to humility...so if tomorrow never comes, know that the overshadowing of the spirit has found you, and named you favored one...birth the grace of christ to the world...say here am i....find yourself in the glory of being chosen...and know that with God, nothing is impossible...

i have a friend that says when we listen to others, their story becomes our story...well, in being found a favored one, God's story becomes our story...grace and peace to you all today in the name of our Lord....

ode to my dear ones

as the wind blew in today, i felt the shift of seasons
so much behind us, so much ahead
days of ongoing anticipation
all to be rewarded with
the line drawn
with a string-
we're done
amen.

burger king hats

the other day, one of my dearest friends from tennessee was talking with me and the strange thing is that i was not disturbed by the fact he was wearing a burger king hat...this is an excellent example of things that are normal for him everyday...where we live, there is a roaming possum around campus, and needless to say he has made it a large part of his mission to catch this critter...this very night, the critter passes by and low and behold, my friend in the burger king hat takes off running to chase the animal...if you have never witnessed an event of such epic proportion, this was one to be a part of...because in all of history, i venture to say this is a one of kind event...so here is to burger king hats and possums...it creates memories that will never die...

grey's anatomy

i detest television...except for one, lone, shining show...i finally watched sunday's episode today and i was moved by just two lines...from dr. mcdreamy- "it wasn't out of revenge, i just fell in love..." and from izzy- "because that is what Jesus would freakin do!!" i find a wealth of knowledge in these two statements...it's kind of like fortune cookies, you can put "in bed" after these statements and still more insights meander into my never-ending whirl of thoughts...

virgin blogger

so, thanks to my gracious friend papps, the streaming of thoughts for the world to see is now possible...i must admit, vulnerablity is not my strong suit...but, in light of this new capablity, i will make a committment to be...interesting...possibly raw at moments, and yes, forthcoming...so here we go, ready or not, here i come!!

First Post

This is Monica's new blog...be prepared to laugh, cry , and grow under the massive knowledge of Monica.